The Tulips Were Always There

I often find that counselling sessions take on a life of their own. Like a new chapter in a novel or a new episode in a television series, where the plot heads in a different direction to what may have been anticipated—perhaps introducing a side story that, for a short time, becomes more impactful than the overriding tale.

This morning’s session was just like that. And among the twists and turns, I discovered that the tulip holds particular significance in Hungarian folk art. Who knew? Clearly not me! It took my client less than a minute to discover something that I had never thought about in 50 years.

With this information, I immediately made the connection—tulips feature heavily in Hungarian embroidery. How did I not notice this before?

I grew up surrounded by Hungarian embroidery. Flowers stitched into tablecloths, clothing, and decorative pieces. I recognised them as Hungarian without ever stopping to consider what the individual flowers might mean—or even what they were.

It is funny how you can look at something your entire life without ever really seeing it. The tulips have always been there. I just never noticed them. And it took someone with no connection to Hungarian culture to point them out to me.

I love these tangents.

Of course, the tangents are not always about Hungarian tulips. They can take us somewhere profound. Other times, we end up going down a completely unexpected rabbit hole together. And I love that.

Perhaps that is one of the things I appreciate most about counselling. I may be the “expert”, but I am certainly not the only person in the room capable of teaching something new. In fact, I often find myself learning right alongside the client.

I don’t feel the need to immediately steer the conversation back on course. I am curious to see where the side story takes us.

Because more often than not, the tangent turns out to be worth following.